Guilt and Shame: Navigating Healthier Coping Strategies

Vic Verdonck
3 min readJan 4, 2024

In the wide landscape of human emotions, guilt and shame are two powerful and often misunderstood companions. While they both fall under the umbrella of self-conscious emotions, the distinction between guilt and shame is crucial for fostering emotional well-being and promoting personal growth.

Guilt vs. Shame: Unraveling the Emotive Threads

Guilt: A Signal for Change

Guilt typically arises in response to a specific behavior or action that an individual perceives as a deviation from their own moral or ethical standards. It acts as an internal compass, signaling the need for reflection and change. When we feel guilty, we are acknowledging that we have done something wrong, and this acknowledgment propels us towards making amends or rectifying our behavior.

For instance, if someone accidentally damages a friend’s property, the ensuing guilt prompts them to take responsibility, apologize, and perhaps offer compensation. In this way, guilt serves as a constructive emotion, guiding individuals toward positive behavioral change and maintaining healthy social relationships.

Shame: A Global Evaluation of Self

Shame, on the other hand, goes beyond the realm of specific behaviors. It is a more pervasive…

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Vic Verdonck

I explain how relationships work. How to tell people what you want to find out who will give you what you need.